Wednesday, January 6, 2016

"I heckled Bill Hicks and lived" - No Passouts

So. Son. Tell me. What have you done with your life? Huh? Lemme hear it. What have you done? No – don’t tell me. I can guess. What is it? Something selfless – the very model of altruistic, new age thought and action. Artesian wells in a struggling, underdeveloped African nation. Am I right? Unceasing lobbying of grimy politicians and vested interest corporations to wake up to the increasing horrors of global warming? A year spent throwing yourself in front of Japanese whalers? Tell me! What did you do? What have you done?

I heckled Bill Hicks.

Oh, yeah, and guess what: all my views are my own because somewhere, I’m reasonably convinced, I have the vague semblance of a spine. Pffft. Twitter. Twitter. Just a few lines to let your prospective new followers (ugh – right?) know you’re worth that all important thumb press. ‘Middle-aged sad lefty from Stoke with fondness for real ale’ was never going to be a stand out, let me assure you. But ‘Heckled Bill Hicks and lived’ is surely one of those wayward claims only open to the few. And so, for five years, it’s awkwardly sat there as my Twitter ‘come on in’ sign.

‘Heckled Bill Hicks and lived.’ Quite a claim…


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